FREE TO JUST BE ME

Trip to Paradise

2011-10-18T22:50:00.000-07:00

HOW TO GET A TICKET:

>Go to www.Paypal.com

> send money to "FRIENDS AND FAMILY"
>payment account is: ADAMUGUERRERO@HOTMAIL.COM

*** CASH will be accepted in person only. No exceptions.

BACKGROUND:
For those who don't know me, my name is Adam Guerrero. I served in the U.S Air Force from 2003-2007 with a deployment to Iraq in 2006. I feel very fortunate to be in the position I'm in because of the great brothers & sisters I've had the pleasure of serving with, who continue to serve and the ones before us that have paved the way. Unfortunately there are HOMELESS VETERANS who are not so lucky. You can learn more at WWW.VETHUNTERS.ORG to see how THE VET HUNTERS PROJECT is trying to get the word out. I am not directly affiliated with the Vet Hunters Project however; I am a veteran that would like to help fellow service members in need by bringing MY friends and family together to help HOMELESS VETERANS because they deserve it for their selfless service.

RAFFLE:
Price of a single ticket will be $10 and there will be no limit to the amount of tickets you can purchase. Tickets will be drawn out of a "hat" as soon as payment has been confirmed. Your name will be recorded with the ticket number drawn and confirmation will be sent to you via Facebook Personal Message or E-Mail. The last date to purchase will be Midnight JAN 31, 2012. The actual raffle will take place SUPERBOWL SUNDAY FEB 5, 2012 at Halftime. Location of the Raffle has yet to be determined but will be updated no later than Jan 10, 2012 via Facebook. With the wide rage of locations to where people will be participating from, you need not be present to WIN.

FIJI TRIP:
This trip will take place no sooner than 90 days after YOU win =) This will allow for flight and resort reservations. The 90 days will also allow time for you to get a passport if you do not have one, to save up for spending cash and to get time off work if needed. It will be an 8 night stay at a 5 Star Resort in Denarau Island, Fiji. ROUNDTRIP Air Fare will be paid for from LAX to Denarau Island, Fiji ONLY. Winners shall pay the difference should they not be able to depart from LAX.

** You must have a passport valid 6 months beyond your intended stay**

When a doctor says "I accidently cut you"......

2009-12-07T14:21:00.000-08:00

It’s been 7 months since my surgery. I can remember my dad driving me to the hospital. It felt like a 5 minute car ride but I think I was so deep in prayer I didn’t even realize the time, we got there so fast. After signing in I curled up on the long chair they had in the waiting room. I looked at my dad and said “Just another day poppa” he just smiled and continued to read the paper. I arrived at 6am and got called back at 6:35am. I looked at my dad and said I'll see you in a minute just going to go get prepped for some fun ;o)

As the nurses applied their little stickers to my body and stuck me with needles, all I could think about was did I finish my checklist? Did I make sure Adam had my life insurance paperwork ready should anything happen? Did I leave a copy of my living will attached to the paperwork? Did I remember to leave specific instructions for funeral arrangements should the need arise? Did I remember to attach my goodbye letters to my family and friends that I call family? Was I ready for the unexpected? Most importantly was my family?

I never thought writing a living will could be so HARD! It took me 3 days to complete that checklist. As the nurse’s were finishing up I had to finish the last thing on my list. I told the nurse should anything happen I want to sign a DNR should the need arise. The nurse looked at me and said “You really don’t have to”. I smiled and said “It’s hard on my parents to have to worry about me having surgery. I am overweight, female and Hispanic and you know that is a triple threat. I don’t want any surprises and I am just covering all bases. I won’t leave that burden on my parents or my siblings. I know what I am asking for and I take full responsibility. I need to sign that DNR!” As much as it hurt to say my goodbyes to my family in those letters….. that signature took the cake. I knew what I was signing and I did not hesitate. If it was my time, then let me be with God.

My dad came in shortly after and sat with me as the anesthesiologist had me sign the final paperwork. I had no negative thoughts going on in my head. I had faith on my side. This was going to be a piece of cake. Dad and I talked for a minute but then it was time for take off. My dad prayed for me and gave me a kiss on my forehead before they rolled me off. I told him I’d see him in an hour. “I love you daddy”. His facial expression was one I have seen before. Although it was not something I had ever seen him express for me, because I have never been to the hospital for broken bones or gotten stitches… For the first time in my life I saw that my dad was more worried for me then I was. I think more because I showed no fear. I talked to god and I knew whatever the outcome…. I was prepared for it, maybe even over prepared.

As I was being rolled through the hallways I noticed everyone rushing in panic for what I had no clue, and then there it was the operating room. I then started to pray for the nurses and doctors that would be doing my surgery. I knew I had to make it quick before the medication kicked in. That operating room had the brightest lights I have ever seen, nothing like the movies. It was so cold. I looked around and before I could scoot over on to the operating table that amazing anesthesiologist smiled at me and said goodnight…. And that was it… Lights OUT!..... There was no counting back from one hundred….

I felt weight on my chest and I felt warmth. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t even open my eyes. My mind was racing but I wanted to scream “I want my DAD!” I felt like my brain would not function. What the heck is going on? What is wrong? I felt someone touch my left leg. My head kept going side to side. FINALLY my eyes opened for a split second, Then again. My eyes caught the clock on the wall.. 3:45pm WHAT??? What has happened? It was only suppose to be an hour surgery and 2 hour recovery? It’s been 8 hours. I kept trying to wake up and I just could not find the strength. 4:00pm My brain finally kicked in.. Nurse! Nurse! Please I want to see my dad! PLEASE LET ME SEE MY DAD! She walked away from me. I thought did she not hear me? Was my brain playing tricks on me? Oh I hate this feeling of not being able to control my actions. When the nurse came back I grabbed a hold of her shirt and said again “BRING ME MY DAD NOW!”

I closed my eyes. I couldn’t understand what was going on. Nothing was making sense. Then there stood my dad. “Poppa what happened? Why is it so late?” all he could say was “Just get rest baby, everything is ok now.” I still persisted. “What happened?” He just kept saying to close my eyes and rest. I didn’t understand. The nurse asked him to leave and that he could see me once I got into my own room… I thought MY OWN ROOM? WHAT! I WANNA GO HOME! Somebody please tell me what is going on? Then it was lights out again. I don’t remember much on how I got to my room but I do remember everyone at my bedside when I finally woke up although still drugged because I later learned I was hooked up to a morphine drip.

As I lay in bed going in and out of a daze, I could see the fake smiles everyone was giving me to mask their true feelings. I didn’t know what was going on. But what I did know was that they were worried for me. The nurses made sure that I was more than comfortable. As everyone kept talking I was coming out of that comatose feeling. I started talking and laughing. I still didn’t understand what was going on but it didn’t matter I was so blessed to be in a room full of love. I called my grandma told her I was ok and I would see her soon. To not worry and that I loved her. She was a little upset that she was not there but only because I told her that I would be home the same day. It was going to be an easy in and out procedure. My fault I’ll admit it. If not she would have been there every step of the way. The night continued with laughter until the doctor walked into the room.

Now I can't imagine what my attitude would have been like had I not fallen in love with Jesus. My surgeon had tried to explain what happened in the operating room but when he said he accidently cut into my large intestine, faces changed from smiles to judgment. He continued to say that he had to cut me open from bellybutton down about 10 inches to go in and fix my large intestine. (My facial expressions did not change) He proceeded to tell me that I had 28 staples in my stomach and that I would be allowed to rest today and but that I would have to start walking tomorrow. I wasn’t impressed with the walking but if it allowed me to go home faster I was all over it.

I could have easily been upset even angry. I’m sure the old me would have had ugly nasty words flying out like a quick whip. Even though I had morphine drip in my veins, the only words that came out of my mouth was “Thank you”. My mom and dad were not so happy with the “accident” and their facial expressions were not so kind which is understandable. Although in my heart I believe the surgeon did his job regardless of the accident. Thanks to him I am alive. I can still breathe on my own and I can move and I can still walk. He did not give me a worse quality of life. I still have my chest pains and on occasion I have some abdominal pain that wasn’t there before but so far I have been able to deal with it.

I don’t think the surgeon was ready for my positive attitude. To be honest I think he had forgotten how to smile. Our prior appointments before surgery had seemed so cold. He was very distant with his responses when I asked him a question. The next day in the hospital my surgeon came to check on my wound and pulled out packing from in between my staples… I know I know eeeewwwww right! Well How do you think I felt when I saw them being pulled out of my stomach! Not so fun but didn’t hurt. It was weird but I assume a necessity. I asked for water or maybe something small to eat but the doctor informed me that due to the trauma to the intestine I could not eat anything for a few days I was only allowed ice chips and only a spoon full every few hours. I really wasn’t hungry but some jello would have been nice. EVERY HOSPITAL HAS JELLO!

The next 2 days was not so fun. I really hated the morphine drip so I asked to have it removed. The nurse said that I had to have the medication and that she would change the medication. I hated feeling like I was going in and out of a coma. I didn't feel normal. Even though you could not unglue the smile on my face I was still in great spirit and ready for what this journey had in store for me. By this time I have already started to walk up and down the halls with this tummy tucker thing wrapped around my body. I have also made a midnight friend who had just had her gastric bypass surgery. We were walking buddies :o) I have just been smiles and laughter since this whole fun began. On the third day my surgeon came to check in on my wound and when he ran his finger down along side the staples of the 10 inch incision I clinched grabbed a hold of the bed frame and started to cry. My dad came rushing in and wanted to hurt that man but it had to be done to make sure that my stomach nerves were starting to work again. He apologized and said everything was looking good. I sucked it up and smiled and said good! My surgeon still amazed with how well I was taking everything.

On the fifth day still with only being able to eat ice chips not that I was hungry because I was to afraid to eat thinking that I would tare open a stitch on the inside, I was told if I wanted to go home I had to fart. I thought to myself sweet… that’s going to be easy. So I thought. Just as I was afraid to eat I was afraid to pass gas. I didn’t want my insides to come out. It wasn’t until the end of the sixth day when I farted and I was so excited I couldn’t wait to tell my surgeon. Once I did I said “Can I have a (yes just one “A”) cracker for passing gas?” He laughed and said “I got something better” The nurse came back with a red Popsicle. Oh my goodness I was in heaven. Yes it was still ice but this time it was flavored. I had the biggest kool-aid smile on my face. When my dad came to visit me I was like “I got a popsicle today poppa!” He laughed at me because he knew that I was ready to come home. But no luck doc said one more day.

When we started this game I was told one hour in surgery and 2 hours for recovery time. I would be back to work in no time. As the lord would have it I spent a week in the hospital a month and a half out of work. I spent that next month and a half in a wheelchair. I visited my surgeon every week. And NOT once did my smile tarnish. My friend who visited me in the hospital could not understand that even at my lowest moment that it was I who still comforted her when I was the one who needed the comfort. So she thought. I told her that the lord has given me a strong back to carry the heavy load, for had it not been for him I would not be alive today.

Undergoing Construction:

2009-11-25T12:10:00.000-08:00

My life has undergone some major construction. So with that being said, my blog went under some major construction as well. I have deleted some of them and edited most of them. This has been an amazing transformation for me and I don’t regret making these changes. I hope that if you loved the old me, then it will be easy to love the new me.

My post’s to come will be the journey that has led me to where I am now in my life. As well as the struggles and the many new journey's life has ahead of me :D

2 Corinthians 5:17 (New King James Version)Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

About Lupus.....

2008-05-09T08:43:00.000-07:00

What you should know about Lupus..

Lupus is a chronic inflammatory disease that can affect various parts of the body, especially the skin, joints, blood, and kidneys.

My girl friend Miss K was diagnosed with Lupus when she was a youngin. Her sister Miss M was always very attentive to Miss K makin sure she was eating, drinking enough fluids, getting enough rest. In 2001 Miss M was then also diagnosed with lupus. Being that Miss M already knew how to take care of her sister and the struggles that came with it, She knew what she was up against. Miss M had to make sure she took care of herself just as she did her sister.

In 2007 Miss M gave us the wonderful news of her pregnancy! All her family and friends were so excited for her. But not her doctors. The doctors knew what Miss M was up against Pregnancy with LUPUS and was something to take into GREAT consideration. "Years ago, all medical texts said that women with lupus could not have children, and if they became pregnant, they should have therapeutic abortions." "We now know that these early conclusions were wrong. Currently, more than 50 percent of all lupus pregnancies are completely normal." but "It is important to note that although many lupus pregnancies will be completely normal, all lupus pregnancies should be considered "high risk." "High risk" is a term commonly used by obstetricians to indicate that solvable problems may occur and must be anticipated." (IE: Miscarriage)

In Feb 2008 Miss M lost her baby. Knowing what she was up against, She took those chances. Now here we are in May of 2008 and Miss M informed us last night that Miss K past away last night due to her Lupus. This disease is taking away some great blessings from Miss M and her family.

In Loving memory of my girl Miss K On the bottom and Her sister Miss M standing up.
The two crazy sister that showed me a thing or two :)
"You will never be forgotten as long as I live" ~MG

WHO we would pray for…AND why??

2008-05-06T12:05:00.000-07:00

Aquamarie posted a blog abour Prayer

I had to blog my response... reason I don't know but had to post it.

This is *WHO* I pray for:

Dear God,

I wanted to thank you for getting my butt out of bed today even when I didn't want to and I hit the snooze button (2-4 times) Only because I didn’t get to bed early enough. But most of all it has come to that part of my day where I pray for everyone. So here I go.

I pray for every passing face I came across in the streets today. Every person I came in contact with today because lets face it the fake smile just didn't work. I also pray for the faces I didn’t see.

I pray for the people with no homes living on the streets. I pray for the people who didn’t get enough to eat today, or the ones who got a beating today. I pray for the ones who didn’t pray in hopes to still find a blessing for them to hold on to.

I pray for all the hearts in the world to find a sense of peace at least for 20 minutes out of their hectic day may it be in the shower or on the thrown but let them find peace to clear their thoughts of all the rubbish this life feeds their brain.

I continue to pray for my loved ones and those I hold very dear in my heart. But the funny thing is that for as long as I have remembered praying I don’t pray for myself much. Unless I am injured or in search for an answer. Not that I don’t need the prayer cause lord knows I can use it but because I have always thought of myself last in everything that I do.

This is *WHY* I pray:

I pray because faith in anything in life is so hard to come by. People lose faith in things so easily when answers are not given. But if we only took a step back to see that the answer was given just not the one we wanted. But the reason behind it we end up seeing later. I have faith in lots of things and in few people. I pray because I love to see miracles happen. I.E: When Katrina happened all the people who came together to help a total stranger for what price? A simple smile or a hug I mean even a tear of gratefulness. How many people were agnostic that helped a stranger? Out of kindness is what that agnostic person would say, although that stranger would say you were my angel that answered my prayers. Another example is 9/11.

I have unconditional eyes when it comes to judgment an unconditional heart when it comes to loving unconditional arms when it comes to someone who needs a hug. I am who I am and I am thankful. I have been blessed with some pretty amazing people on this journey called life. May they be apart of it for a reason, season or a lifetime.

I pray for you in hopes that god hears my prayers and in return prays for me :D

How to get a cop to let you off the hook????

2008-04-25T11:45:00.000-07:00

One late night at college I got a phone call from my husband “Best Friend” He tells me that he is @ his friends house and he has been there all day and that he has not had anything to eat all day. My husband asked me to please save him and pick him up. So being his wife I said ok love I am closing up now and I will get their as fast as I can. I told my professor that I needed to go she said no worries there was only 20 minutes left in class. So I grabbed my things jumped in my car. Now my college was in Anaheim and he was in Riverside (45 minute drive with out traffic). So with traffic being so horrible during the holidays I did the unthinkable. I jumped in the car pool lane. As I drove I kept looking over my shoulder for cops but nothing so I kept going. As I got into corona I was like SCORE I’m in the home stretch! As I was 3 exits away from my husband I noticed a motorcycle cop approaching. I tried to get out but it was too late. He passed me up and I was like “Damn Almost”. I got out of the car pool lane and was exiting the freeway when I saw the lights behind me. For some odd reason I didn’t panic like I usually do. So I pull over on the off ramp and roll down my passenger window. The cop comes over and the usual “License and Registration Please?”

Now you all know that I don’t think before I speak so I asked *nicely* as I was digging in my glove box “Excuse me sir? But why did you pull me over?” He smirked and said are you serious? I smiled and was like yeah! He said well miss you were in the car pool lane and you are the only person in the car…. *I smirked* I said “hmmmm Well I weigh enough for two people does that count? *mumbled but didn’t think he could hear* I mean if I was on a air plane I would have to pay for 2 seats for comfort? What makes this any different?” as I handed him my license and registration I looked at him and he looked constipated… But he bared his head in between his legs and died of laughter! As I was holding mine in best as I could. I didn’t think he was going to take it as well as he did but as he finally composed himself he handed me back my paperwork and said “Miss you are lucky I’m in a good mood tonight. Happy Holidays and don’t let me catch you in riverside ever again!”

"Is HE ready or is it I am NOT ready?

2008-04-11T08:16:00.000-07:00

For those of you on twitter I always talk about my son. Well let me give you a quick low down on my son. He is 16 years old and I did not give birth to him. Three months after he was born my mom had to go back to work. Her going back left my sister and I to raise my little brother. He has always called my sister and I mom since he could speak and it never stopped. My sister and I have supported him through out his life in all the dreams he wanted and all of the goals he wanted to meet. He once saved my life and I think that is why I am SO OVER protective of him... Which leads me to the "Is HE ready or is it I am NOT ready?

He has a date tonight with his girlfriend of 2 weeks. He has had other girlfriends in the past (I didn't like them and scarred most of them off) But this one is different. He has his head in the clouds most of the time while he is at home TRYING to do homework but the second that phone of his says text message from the GIRLFRIEND everything else fades away. Now don't get me wrong I love my son and want nothing but the best for him and I just don't want to see him get caught up in a girl. He has maintained a 4.1gpa since he was in 6th grade. He has colleges looking at him and I want to see him have a great education and prosper in so many ways. I on the other hand was not the greatest in school didn't care for it and sure as hell didn't get good grades like him. Plus what mother doesn’t want the best for their children? What mother doesn’t want them to have better?

Tonight I have to take a step back and allow him to grow up and be a man. Truth be told I am scarred as hell that he might have sex and I told my sister to make sure he has condoms. Well the text I got back was "THE PULL OUT METHOD WORKS TOO" I was livid I could not believe what I was reading I was so pist I wrote her back some evil things and never got a reply back. So I let it slide because lets face it she is my sister and I love her and you can’t stay mad at each other forever! So This morning I pick up my son and I am taking him to school and I say to him "Baby, I know your going out on a date tonight here is some money for WHATEVER you may need!" He looked at me and laughed and said "Keep your money mom I have money but thank you." I didn't know what to say so before he got out of the car I said "Look I am going to pick up some condoms for you and that is final!" the next comment I did not expect to come out of his mouth. "THE PULL OUT METHOD WORKS TOO" OMG I was so pist off... Come to find out my sister had not been the one sending me those text's it was my own son. I said LOOK!!.. He stopped me before I could yell or get another word out and said "MOM I'M NOT STUPID AND IT'S NOT LIKE THAT! I PROMISE!"

The bell rang and he had to go into school. I drove to work thinking about what he had said. As a mom I worry cause we have all been in that situation when you’re in the moment and one doesn't think of “I didn't bring a rubber!” Girls these days lie about being on birth control and I just don't want to see him get caught up in that. But As I got closer to work, I realized that with all the crap he has seen my friends and my sisters friends go through I am sure that all 3 of his mom's have raised him better than that. I have to think that! I have to reassure myself that he knows better!

As his sister/mom we have a tight bond. He has never needed to lie to me and he knows that. We are open to all things. Alcohol, Drugs, Girls, Sex, Love, Life, Death, and most of all Unconditional Love! But has all that talking we have done worked? I guess only time will tell…

My little angel..... NOT!

2008-04-07T11:39:00.000-07:00

So my puppy is a little out there but she is a good dog. Although I just caught her trying to go potty in the back room :( Caught it in enough time to take her outside.

There are days I wish I could have more time with her to train her better but its moments like these that make it all worth while lol!

she said thank you for loving me too! ~AM~

2008-04-01T08:20:00.000-07:00

So last night my god daughter wanted to sleep with me instead of mommy. She was rubbing my hair and talking to me. She is so cute. As I felt myself drifting away (cause she was putting me to sleep LOL) I prayed and thanked god for taking care of my babies and I thanked him for their mom’s health and safe arrival to my apartment. As I continued to pray I heard my god daughter repeating me. As I finished I looked over at her and she said with those beautiful hazel green eyes. Auntie Mo my mommy doesn’t pray why do you pray and why did you pray for us? Little did she know she took my breath away! I explained to her that some people pray because they are thankful for the good things that were given to them. So she proceeded to ask me why I prayed for my family. I told her “Well my love, I pray for everyone I love and everyone life has allowed me to meet because in some way they have helped me to be a better person and praying for them even if you don’t know if they pray for you means no matter what you love them.” She gave me a huge hug and smiled and then she began to pray. As I heard her prayer I wanted to record her so her parents could hear what she was praying for but in time I hope they see that their children need them more than they know. As she finished praying she said thank you for loving me too! ~AM~ Now, I looked at her and said honey what was the AM for she said isn’t that what your supposed to say when your done praying. I said your right AMEN. Now I did not force her to pray it was more like monkey see monkey do! I know her mother is catholic and her father is Christian and it doesn’t matter to me what religion they are raising their children. My job as their godmother is simple. I am to LOVE them to PROTECT them and to help them GROW. I just loved her prayer and the AM at the end.